After experiencing birth trauma and the isolation of becoming a first-time mother during the pandemic, Laura was both excited and determined that her next pregnancy, birth, and postpartum was going to be different. The experience with her daughter, Millie, was going to be her ‘redo’.

Unfortunately for Laura, re-experiencing fetal growth restriction (IUGR) and a precipitous labour broke her. Flashbacks, insomnia, panic attacks, and depression immediately hijacked her second postpartum and left her feeling more hopeless and alone than ever before - an undoing, rather than a redoing.

As Millie turns one, Laura and I sit down to reflect on the year that was: the pervasive way that birth trauma impacts our parenting, the incredible and not-so-incredible supports that Laura was able to lean on, the challenges of navigating a mental health system that’s not neatly designed to accommodate the logistics of parenting an older child, and the moments Laura can now enjoy with her daughter thanks to the help she did receive.

This is Laura’s story - a story about reflection and rebuilding - and it isn’t one to miss.

Monique’s birth may have been quick, but its complications and long-term impacts were anything but. From a 3rd degree tear, prolapse, severe postpartum haemorrhage, partial levator avulsion, a near death experience, and a stay in the ICU, she paints a picture of the pain from her birth trauma and postpartum PTSD as a ‘storm’ - one that she is still weathering.

But thanks to talk therapy with her long-time psychologist, self-compassion, group therapy through the Australasian Birth Trauma Association (ABTA), and the support of her husband, it’s no longer a storm that she is weathering alone.

Join me in this episode to hold space for Monique’s incredibly moving story that shines a gut-wrenching light on birth trauma and why it matters. Please note, this episode vividly describes the experience and impact of physical and psychological trauma - go gently.

Like many mothers, Sarah from The Pesky Placenta Society struggled to decipher whether her pregnancy symptoms were ‘normal’ or something more sinister. But with a pre-existing chronic illness, Sarah also had to confront her complicated relationship with health anxiety. Unfortunately, the concerns she raised were proven to be more than ‘just anxiety’ when at 35 weeks pregnant, Sarah nearly died from pre-eclampsia - or what she refers to as “her pesky placenta”.

This is a story about the challenges of navigating both mental ill health and physical ill health in pregnancy; about fighting to be believed and to believe yourself; about the trauma that comes with nearly dying during what is supposed to be the happiest time of your life; about the struggles of bonding with your baby when your brain tells you that mothering is a barrier to your healing; and about the power of pre-emptive planning to protect your mental health. Most importantly, it is a story about hope that with the right support, things will get better.

This is Sarah’s story.

As a self-confessed ‘flaming extrovert’, Lauren struggled with the isolating and all-consuming eat-play-sleep-bathe-repeat cycle of early motherhood. By six months postpartum, the newborn ‘love bubbles’ that she felt so intensely after both of her births became overshadowed by the onset of postpartum depression.

From IVF, miscarriage, severe pregnancy health complications, to two traumatic births, this depression was only the latest in a long line of anxiety and trauma that Lauren experienced on the journey to motherhood.

In this powerful episode, Lauren opens up about her mental health during her pregnancy and postpartum with both of her daughters, and shares with us what helped her through this time - from the PANDA National Helpline (1300 726 306), medication, talk therapy, EMDR, and a psychiatric hospital admission, to her supportive and loving partner, Alex.

While walking the sunny halls of the psychiatric hospital, Lauren created her blog ‘Mental as a Mother’ and is now a volunteer for PANDA. You can follow Lauren on Instagram as @mental.asamother where she hilariously shares all things motherhood, mental health, fertility, and feminism - while wearing her signature bold lip, of course.